Start Your Morning with Three Red Bulls

City 2 Villa 1

One of the most pivotal Premier League fixtures of the season did not disappoint, as late drama saw Pep’s side devastate Villa with a 94th-minute winner from Matheus Nunes. The finish, though tidy, pales in comparison to the outside of the boot magic created by Jeremy Doku’s cross, which was so perfect it appeared to benefit from radar guidance.

The win sees City climb to third having played one more match than 4th through 6th. Importantly, they did not relinquish the opportunity to control their own destiny. That sweater-wearing son of a gun is going to turn the lemons of City’s disaster season into the lemonade of Champions League football, isn’t he? And those revenues will be critical in refreshing a squad needing a refresh, won’t they?

Villa were due a setback after such a heroic run of form, but this one might have come at the worst possible time. Redemption awaits against Palace at Wembley over the weekend.

Arsenal 2 Palace 2

Arsenal took the pitch at the Emirates aware that their competitors in Liverpool were gathered around the television clamoring for a Gunners loss that would seal their claim on the title.

Arteta’s side proved unobliging to start, with Jakub Kiwior—admirable in his replacement of Gabriel—scoring in the third minute. But the lead was short-lived, as Eberechi Eze lashed a volley into the ground and through the defense to equalize. Leandro Trossard found another goal before halftime, but that lead, too, would prove only temporary.

Gathering the ball from a Saliba mistake, Jean-Philippe Mateta—our tucked-in, earguard-wearing aura king—dispatched an instinctive and inch-perfect chip to beat David Raya in the 83rd minute. The goal drew a rapturous uproar from the visiting support, and though Palace would not find a third to gift wrap the trophy for Liverpool, their noble effort ensures Slot’s side will need only a point against Spurs at Anfield.

For Arsenal, it’s the story of the season, as they drew for the 13th time—many of those draws against inferior opponents. The maximum number of points they can reach is 79, a commendable total, but rarely enough to win a league with City and Liverpool in it.

Patrice Evra said it best: watching Arsenal is like watching Netflix, you always have to wait for the next season. However, this year’s season finale could end with Ole Big Ears finally finding a home in the Arsenal trophy case. No small consolation, that.

🤝 Valencia and Espanyol tied 1-1 to extend their unbeaten runs to eight and five respectively, pulling both sides comfortably clear of the relegation battle.

🥇 Barcelona needed only a 46th-minute goal from Dani Olmo to down Mallorca, who failed to register a shot on target. The hosts, on the other hand, recorded more shots than an LMFAO song, vying for goal on 40 different occasions.

4⃣ Inaki Williams scored in the 5th minute to bring Athletic three points closer to Champions League qualification. They’re 8 points clear of sixth place.

🔥 Celta Vigo recovered from their hard-fought 4-3 loss to Barcelona with a 3-0 drubbing of Villareal, dealing a blow to the visitors’ European hopes. Borja Iglesias scored for Celta Vigo to make it four goals in two games.

📈 Alaves climbed out of the relegation places with a 1-0 victory over Sociedad. Don't get too comfortable: their cushion stands at a meager two points.

🇹🇷 Arda Guler struck in the first half to secure a 1-0 win over Getafe and pull Madrid within four points of Barcelona. Is the Turkish sensation too good to suffer another season as a bit-part player for Los Blancos? Might depend on what Xabi Alonso thinks of him.

🔴⚪ Atlético cruised past Rayo Vallecano, with goals from Alexander Sorloth, Conor Gallagher, and Julian Alvarez.

🟢 Betis climbed into 5th in the table—now a Champions League place—with a 5-1 destruction of (now relegated) Valladolid. Five players netted for Betis, including Isco for the second straight game.

🥋 Lazio continued its Champions League pursuit, pulling within a point of fourth with a 2-0 win over Genoa. Valentin Castellanos scored this flying volley to open the scoring.

👵 Juventus remain unconvincing despite the brief new manager bounce, falling 1-0 at Parma after Mateo Pellegrino’s first-half stoppage time goal. Like Lazio, the Old Lady sits a point out of fourth.

🟣 Fiorentina beat Cagliari 2-1 with goals from Robin Gosens and Lucas Beltran. La Viola remain a dark horse for European spots with 56 points, four points outside of the top four.

Coppa Italia Semifinals (Second Leg)

Inter 0 Milan 3 (1-4 Aggregate)

Milan’s clubs have played five Derby della Madonnina fixtures this season, and the red side have lost none of them. Luka Jovic, capably assuming the leading striker position in recent weeks, notched a brace and Tijani Reijnders added a third to bounce the Serie A league leaders from the competition.

In an uninspiring debut campaign for Sergio Conceicao, the domestic cups could prove a saving grace. You sense the higher-ups won’t take such thorough handling of their chief rivals lightly. On the other hand, you also sense that their rivals might not mind if they keep Conceicao in charge.

Bologna 2 Empoli 1 (5-1 Aggregate) 

This one was decided before it began on Thursday, and Vincenzo Italiano’s impressive start at Bologna continues. Giovanni Fabbian scored for the hosts to extend the 3-0 advantage amassed in the first leg. Bologna beat Milan in their only meeting this season, and now the two sides could meet twice in four days in May.

🇫🇷 PSG did just enough to keep its invincible run alive in Ligue 1, drawing 1-1 at Nantes after Douglas equalized for the home side in the 83rd minute.

🇨🇦 Vancouver beat Inter Miami 2-0 in the first leg of the CONCACAF Champions Cup Semifinal. Sebastian Berhalter, son of Gregg, scored in the 85th minute for the rolling Whitecaps. Just when you think the USMNT might escape the Berhalter tribe, another one appears poised to join the setup before long.

🇳🇱 PSV won its game-in-hand, beating Twente 3-1 with goals from Ivan Perisic, Guus Til, and Luuk de Jong. They sit six points behind Ajax with four games remaining.

🇧🇪 Union Saint-Gilloise went to the top of the Belgian Pro League table with a 1-0 win at Brugges on Thursday. Alessio Castro Montes was the goalscorer. The two sides meet again on Sunday. Elsewhere in Belgium, Kasper Dolberg scored four goals for Anderlecht in a 5-0 demolition of Gent.

🇵🇹 Sporting and Benfica both booked their tickets to the Taca de Portugal Final. Victor Gyokeres scored his fourth goal in two games.

🇹🇷 Trabzonspor and Galatasaray advanced to the Final of the Turkish Cup. Rolland Sallai scored a brace in Gala’s 5-1 win.

🇧🇷 Future Chelsea player Estevao Willian scored in Palmeiras’ 3-2 win over Bolivar. Palmeiras is perfect in group play.

Liverpool vs. Spurs (11:30 AM SUN)

Thanks to Palace’s gutsy draw at the Emirates, all that stands between Liverpool and a trophy lift in front of the Anfield support is one of the worst sides in the league. But we can’t ignore the attention to narrative from Premier League scriptwriters, and Richarlison is salivating at the unique chance to spoil the party.

Not this time, Richy. On Sunday, Liverpool will finally revel in the celebrations they missed during their COVID triumph. Prepare to be Freed from Desire.

FA Cup Semifinals

Palace vs. Aston Villa (12:15 PM SAT)

Both sides recently saw imperious runs of form come to a conclusion, but their chances of FA Cup glory are as good as anyone else’s at this stage in the competition. While Aston Villa still has Champions League football to contend for, Palace’s focus is devoted entirely to Wembley.

Do it for Pardew, lads. Do it for Pardew.

Forest vs. City (11:30 AM SUN)

Like Villa, Forest and City will divert their attention from European qualification toward England’s most storied trophy. Pep might just Houdini his side into the Champions League, but every neutral in world football will yearn for the trees to cast their cool shade on City’s FA Cup hopes.

Help us, Odoi-Wan Kenobi. You’re our only hope.

Villareal vs. Espanyol (10:15 AM SUN)

The only match in La Liga this weekend sees sixth-place Villareal attempt to regain fifth, as the Yellow Submarine plays their game in hand against Espanyol, who haven’t lost in their last five matches.

Copa Del Rey Final

Barcelona vs. Real Madrid (4:00 PM SAT)

An El Clasico Copa Del Rey Final: the fixture dreams are made of. While far from finished, Barcelona exerts an unfailing grip on the lead in La Liga, but Madrid can claim vital bragging rights on Saturday. Arda Guler and Endrick have played a significant role for Madrid in this competition; will the outgoing Carlo Ancelotti lean on them again or is this a moment for big dogs only?

Inter vs. Roma (9:00 AM SUN)

Nowhere in Italy will the stakes be higher than at the San Siro on Sunday, where league leaders Inter—level on points with Napoli—host Claudio Ranieri’s Roma, who haven’t lost in Serie A since December. Either something has to give, or the sides will settle for a 1-1 draw that offers no seismic shift in the league table.

Probably the latter, huh?

Bayern vs. Mainz (9:30 AM SAT)

A Bayern win and a Leverkusen loss or draw would see the Bavarians reclaim the Meisterschale. The games take place concurrently in what’s sure to be a drama-filled Saturday morning. Mainz have slipped into dire form, failing to win in their last five matches. They won’t want to play the role of honor guard for Bayern as they look to reignite their Champions League chase.

Frankfurt vs. Leipzig (12:30 PM SAT)

Speaking of the Champions League chase, third hosts fourth in a weighty clash of European hopefuls in Frankfurt. Neither side has been convincing in the run-in, but each can take a massive step towards the continent’s premier competition with a win on Saturday. For both clubs, qualification might be the difference between retaining and selling their top talents in their Sisyphean quest to build stable and talented squads.

PSG vs. Nice (2:45 PM FRI)

Fresh off an uncharacteristic, dull draw against Nantes on Tuesday, PSG again puts their invincibility on the line against 5th-place Nice on Friday evening. The Parisians must remain vigilant on short rest with a glitzy occasion at the Emirates beckoning days later.

🇧🇪 Just after beating them 1-0 on Thursday, Union Saint-Gilloise hosts Club Brugges at 12:30 PM ET on Sunday. It’s a matchup between the two top sides in the Belgian Pro League, though Genk could climb the table with a win against Antwerp.

🇵🇹 Benfica and Sporting play the 16th and 17th-place sides in the Portuguese Primeira Liga respectively; any dropped points could hand the other side a massive boost in the title race.

🇳🇱 Coming off a bitter 4-0 defeat to Utrecht, Ajax hosts Sparta on Sunday morning at 8:30 AM ET. A win would see them extend their lead to nine points with one more game played than PSV.

🇺🇸 Inter Miami hosts Dallas at 5:00 PM on Sunday, though the more compelling matchup in MLS may be Vancouver (1st place in the Western Conference) visiting Minnesota (3rd in the West). Vancouver is unbeaten in its last five, while Minnesota hasn’t lost since February.

🇦🇷 In Argentina, River Plate hosts Boca Juniors on Sunday at 2:30 PM ET in the most attended Superclásico in history.

🇲🇽 The Clausura play-in games take place on Sunday night in Mexico. Sergio Ramos’s Monterrey host Pachuca at 9:30 PM ET.

🇧🇷 The Classico das Multidões pits hosts Flamengo against Corinthians on Sunday at 3:00 PM ET. The sides are 2nd and 6th in the Brazilian Serie A table.

🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 Leeds have sealed promotion, but there’s still the title to fight for. They host Bristol City on Monday at 3:00 PM ET. The visitors sit fifth, with a strong chance of making the promotion play-offs.

🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿 In League One, second-place Wrexham (86 points) hosts fourth-place Charlton (82 points) on Saturday at 12:30 PM ET in a game that could have massive implications for automatic promotion with two games remaining.

👋 Jamie Vardy announced that he will depart Leicester City at the end of the season. His departure closes the curtain on an improbable era that featured a Premier League title, thousands of Red Bulls, hundreds of Skittles Vodkas, and a record amount of taunting. We hope to see his story continue in the Prem next season, where some promoted side can benefit from his penchant for the dark arts.

We’ll fondly recall when he made fun of Kasper Schmeichel for saying hello to his Danish teammate Pierre-Emile Hojbjerg.

Ohh, Danish friends!

🏃‍♂ The chase is on for Bournemouth center-back Dean Huijsen, who has a £50 million release clause and no shortage of suitors. Among them are Arsenal, Chelsea, and Liverpool, with lingering interest from Real Madrid and Bayern. We haven’t seen a youngster with this many desirable choices since Zack Siler couldn’t decide which Ivy League college to attend in She’s All That.