We Could Be #1!

🇺🇸 CONCACAF Nations League Semifinals

USA 0 Panama 1

Cecilio Waterman did the impossible. He gave us a Nations League moment that we might actually remember.

In the 94th minute, Waterman struck the winner for Panama, sprinting straight towards the presenters’ pitch-side desk to embrace Thierry Henry and scream “YOU’RE MY IDOL” right in his face. In any other walk of life, that might land you in handcuffs.

In football? It’s the best thing we’ll see all international break.

The USMNT followed up a disappointing Copa America performance last summer, in which they were eliminated by Panama, with a disappointing Nations League performance last night, in which they were eliminated by Panama. That’s not what you’d expect to see from a squad that Mauricio Pochettino said could be #1 in the world.

The US used to be comparatively devoid of talent but overflowing with effort and desire. Now that their talent has caught up, the effort and desire are persistently lacking.

Worse, our Concacaf Nations League bracket is officially busted.

Canada 0 Mexico 2

Raul Jimenez is all the way back, and so is Mexico? The Fulham striker has seemingly found his way back to his very best form, scoring in the first minute and then making it a brace with an insane free kick in the 75th.

Canada were wrongfully denied a penalty, but they weren’t wrongfully denied a win on a night when Mexico looked to have rediscovered some confidence.

🇧🇷🇨🇴 CONMEBOL World Cup Qualifying

Brazil 2 Colombia 1

It looks like Brazil will somehow manage without Neymar.

Ballon d’Or contender Raphinha opened the scoring from the spot for the Seleção, but Luis Diaz equalized in the 41st minute. Diaz has scored just once in his last 15 games but had no problem slotting past his Liverpool teammate Alisson (who later left the game with a head injury).

With the match heading toward a stalemate, Vinicius Junior delivered a moment of delirium, striking from distance to win it in the 99th minute.

🇪🇺 UEFA Nations League Quarterfinals (First Leg)

Netherlands 2 Spain 2

Between Lamine Yamal and Nico Williams, Spain boasts one of the great, young winger tandems in football, and this time it was the latter opening the scoring for the visitors in Rotterdam. Liverpool fans will welcome the sight of Cody Gakpo starting and equalizing for the Oranje.

Until Slot arrived, Dutch Gakpo was only a mythological creature to Liverpudlians, his form never clicking as prolifically in red as it did in orange. Now, the two Gakpos are one, and he’ll be expected to help a faltering Liverpool side regain its attacking bite.

The Dutch took the lead early in the second half through Tijani Reijnders from an incisive Jeremie Frimpong cutback. But they couldn’t preserve it through the final whistle, as Arsenal superstriker Mikel Merino pounced on a rebound to level things late in stoppage time. The second leg awaits in Valencia on Sunday.

An additional note in defense for Spain: Dean Huijsen replaced an injured Pau Cubarsi at the back, making his Spanish debut against the country he represented for much of his youth. Do the “no celebrating against your former club” rules apply to nations? Perhaps we’ll find out in Valencia.

Italy 1 Germany 2

A week to remember for Sandro Tonali: the Italian midfielder followed up his Carabao Cup-winning weekend with the opening goal for the Azzurri. The lead didn't last until halftime, as Tim Kleindeinst equalized shortly before.

Leon Goretzka scored the winner with a headed goal in the 76th minute, ensuring that Germany will take a lead into the second leg at Signal Iduna Park in Dortmund on Sunday. That doesn’t strike us as an easy place to claw back a deficit.

Italy are without Serie A leading scorer Mateo Retegui, who departed camp due to a thigh injury. More trouble for the Azzurri: Ricardo Califiori exited the game after an awkward non-contact fall.

Croatia 2 France 0

Just as we all predicted, Ivan Perisic spurred Croatia to an upset victory, assisting Ante Budemir’s opener and scoring one of his own to double the advantage. It could’ve been worse for the French; Andrej Kramaric had a penalty saved in the 8th minute.

With Kylian Mbappé and Ousmane Dembélé in such rampant form for their clubs, it's startling to see a team featuring both superstars fail to score. More bad news for Les Bleus (and les Rouges, for that matter): Ibrahima Konaté came off at halftime with a knock.

Stade de France awaits.

Denmark 1 Portugal 0

There’s only one thing you need to know about this game: Rasmus Højlund scored, and he hit Ronaldo’s “SIUUU” celebration….with Ronaldo on the pitch.

What we wouldn’t give for the irrational confidence to do a legend’s celebration right in said legend’s face mere days after breaking a lengthy scoring drought that was the mockery of the footballing world.

Rasmus Højlund: so freaking back.

Two goals in his last two. One more and United might be able to trick Chelsea into buying him.

🇯🇵 AFC World Cup Qualifying

Japan 2 Bahrain 0

Ticket punched!

Japan’s victory sealed their place as the first official qualifier for the 2026 World Cup, joining hosts Canada, Mexico, and the United States. Goals from Daichi Kamada and Takefusa Kubo spurred the Samurai Blue to their sixth victory in seven games in third-round group play. We wouldn’t want to be whichever country draws the unwelcome honor of facing Liverpool legends Wataru Endo and Takumi Minamino in North America next summer.

🇪🇺 UEFA World Cup Qualifying

The long road to World Cup 2026 begins today in Europe, where the Nations League rejects* begin group play.

*At least the ones not condemned to the dreaded Nations League relegation playoffs. Oh no! Take my eyes but don’t relegate me in the Nations League!

England vs. Albania (3:45 PM FRI), England vs. Latvia (3:45 PM MON)

Before we write again, England will have played not just once but twice in qualifying competition. Their foes? 65th-ranked Albania and 140th-ranked Latvia. Tommy Teuchel would be wise to find six points from those two games to start his competitive England career on the right note.

Speaking of notes, he may never get his much-anticipated chance to sing the notes of the English national anthem without these two wins.

Moldova vs. Norway (1:00 PM SAT)

We simply can’t have another major international competition that excludes Erling Haaland. It’s time for this goalscoring terminator to drag his country across the finish line and bring his rare talents to the world stage. He’ll have help from in-form Atlético Madrid super-sub Alexander Sørloth. Move over, Moldova.

🇲🇽🇵🇦 CONCACAF Nations League Final

Mexico vs. Panama (9:30 PM SUN)

For the first time in the competition’s existence, a non-US winner will be crowned. Mexico is favored, particularly after last night’s performance, but Concacaf is anything but predictable. Just ask Mauricio Pochettino.

Third-Place Game: Canada vs. United States (6:00 PM SUN)

🇺🇾🇦🇷 CONMEBOL World Cup Qualifying

Uruguay vs. Argentina (7:30 PM FRI)

This game won’t have Lionel Messi, Lautaro Martinez, Paulo Dybala, or the internationally retired Luis Suarez.

But you know what it will have?

International Darwin Nunez. Same agent of chaos, more goals.

Uruguay have taken 4 points from their last 5 meetings with Argentina.

🇪🇺 UEFA Nations League Quarterfinals (Second Leg)

All games at 3:45 PM ET SUN

Spain vs. Netherlands (2-2 Agg)

France vs. Croatia (0-2 Agg)

Portugal vs. Denmark (0-1 Agg)

Germany vs. Italy (2-1 Agg)

📈📉 Promotion and relegation are coming to the United States!

Not to MLS; you can relax, Kraft family.

No, instead, when the first division of the USL debuts in the 2028 season, it will do so as part of a three-division USL pyramid. Complacent cellar-dwellers won’t be safe to wallow in the depths of irrelevancy in this league. They’ll fall through the trap door to a lower level of competition, just as they do worldwide.

The question is: will it be enough to compete with MLS’s well established head start in the country?